I have to write quickly, before my wildly gobbling brain moves on to the next exciting thing and all of these small steps lose their newness. There have been several topics lately which have been subject of my personal research. Here are where my off-time brain power has been focused:
1) smart grocery shopping. I've been reading books on how to maximize savings at grocery stores using coupons during sales, and 'stockpiling' on things I use regularly. I've learned a lot lately about how grocery stores work, which has contributed to being able to shop better. When you know what can be frozen and how long, what good prices are for the things you buy, and what is better to make yourself, than buy prepared, you can save quite a bit of money. I also recently discovered that while I know that usually 2/$4 sales don't mean you have to buy 2 to get that price, I didn't know you could use a manufacturer's coupon AND a store coupon for the same item. I hadn't made a habit of getting rainchecks when sale items were sold out. And I didn't know my local stores doubled coupons up to $.99. Live and learn.
2) being more conscious of where my food comes from. This is the first summer I've ever tried to garden. While my summer garden wasn't super successful (in terms of fruitfulness), it was a very interesting learning experience. There are still tomatoes on the vine. And there are new peppers budding. Anyway, since I couldn't grow my own produce (although I'm not done trying yet), I've joined a CSA (community supported agriculture)! I placed my first order today, and I pick up on Saturday morning. I ordered a whole lotta basil (pesto!!!) and a whole lotta tomatoes (a ten pound box! I'm going to try my hand at puttin' by--canning for later). I'm excited to know exactly where my produce comes from, support a local famer (Pennsylvania), and have a regular steady supply of produce, to help encourage my diet to be more fruit and veggie-centered, instead of meat centered and heavier on fat and processed foods.
3) researching sustainable living. This includes both 1) and 2), and budgeting, learning how to make my own laundry detergent, and learning how to preserve. I've also been focused on reducing my carbon footprint-- I can proudly say last week I walked to work 5/6 days, and I'm making a good faith effort this week. There are so many benefits to making these small decisions: exercise, the knowledge that I didn't waste energy or add to the exhaust we breathe, and saving money on gas. Eventually, I'm going to be able to implement the envelope system for budgeting and spending my money in an effort to live on less, and the more I read, the more I feel like I could change.
...and now back to searching for salsa recipes for canning, preferred conditions for eggplant growth, and articles on how one knows when to pick and eat figs! hooray for small steps that lead to big changes!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
thinking about global community
This moment of introspection is becoming the best part of my day.
I was nearly half an hour late to church this morning. I did not miss the sermon, however, and the message was widely centered around the idea of community. We follow the lectionary at my church, and the gospel reading this morning was quite lengthy-- the service of foot washing that Jesus does for the disciples. How in those simple actions, Jesus was once again in service to the world, service born of love for community. And the prime example of how we are all called to serve-- our love is an action-- our community. We experience community in relationships; relationships between two people-- ourselves and another-- but our community is not just those relationships put together. We understand on the micro level, but we are not limited to a micro community. Our community is not just who we know and spend our time with, our community is the entire body of our human brothers and sisters. The global community and every living thing in it.
I realize how 'hippie' this sounds. But it feels so enlightened. I was not reared to care this way for others-- sure, I was taught to be fair, and to not harm, and that my actions have consequences. But to actively seek loving others-- no, no, that I still am learning how to do. The more time I spend not struggling to care for me, the more energy I have to devote to keeping my eyes and ears open to witness the rest of the world live. And open eyes, once opened, cannot be closed without remembering images of what has already been seen. It's okay if I sound 'hippie,' because I'm finding out that if caring for others is 'hippie,' than that is a moniker I'll gladly accept.
I was able today to remember a not-too-distant dream of living in intentional community. And just because my first opportunity to live in intentional community did not come to long-term fruition, does not mean that the idea of living that way has failed. I still really believe that when you live together with others, when people born from different families depend on one another for their livelihood and in service to each other and to others, still, family is created. No one can control the circumstances of their birth, but we all can control where we go from there. I so often feel on the verge of getting it. On the verge of being able to cast away my materialism and consumeristic nature, to not only know logically that the things in life that are important don't have anything to do with how I look or how much I have, but how when I share what I have with others, I create beauty. Today, I remembered how close I have come to that feeling, and that it exists. I remembered why I wanted to start this blog, and more what the idea for this project was centered around-- the global community. To see what others are doing, beyond my sheltered life. To spread a message of empowerment and hope to more and more. To hear their stories and to acknowledge and preserve them as a source of encouragement to others who feel that they simply can't. My hope is to live and breathe and sleep and dream community. How could I have forgotten?
In conversation with a friend this weekend about living in service to community, she shared with me a really intriguing idea. It seems that she keeps a list. A list of 100 things-- a life list. I think this is probably somewhat similar to the 'Bucket List' idea, although I never saw the movie. The only difference here, is that you can't make your list all about you. It shouldn't be 100 things to do before you die that will bring you glory. Or even all things for the sake of doing them. The point is to make a list of 100 things that will benefit your community. Things that will make you a better person, more equipped to serve others. Things that will directly or indirectly provide some sort of service or relief to someone in need. And while that sounds really specific, (and also really 'hippie'), it needn't be boring. For instance, my friend has on her list that she'd like to own a beach house some day when she has extra funds to invest, so that she can volunteer her beach house as a retreat center for young people groups to gather for fellowship. While I don't necessarily want to add that to my list, I can understand that it's a bit more realistic for someone in her (or my) position to have a goal like that than to put on the list, 'give all of my possessions to charity'. In creating a goal, it is sometimes necessary to be realistic. I've only had a few days to think about it, but I thought that I would start my Community 100 List here-- and since I fully anticipate this blog will stay with me as I work toward #1, perhaps I'll get to cross some other things off the list, as well.
Community 100 List
1. Experience global community through the preparation and two year adventure of Project Empowerment (Project Global Community! Should we rename?)
2. Pay off my student loans, through my own blood, sweat and tears-- and never borrow again
3. Graduate with (not only degrees but) ideas and understanding to implement them
4. Understand and be able to communicate with enough Spanish and French for Latin America and Africa
5. Eat locally
6. Learn how to preserve and can
7. Garden and share the bounty with others, successfully
8. Walk more, drive less
9. Live more generously, bury selfishness
10. Meet brethren, and sit with God on all seven continents (or in the getting to of all seven continents)
11. Be a storyteller with hopeful and sometimes disturbing narratives-- and publish them
Clearly I'll be thinking about more ways to contribute to the global community-- and listing them-- this week!
I was nearly half an hour late to church this morning. I did not miss the sermon, however, and the message was widely centered around the idea of community. We follow the lectionary at my church, and the gospel reading this morning was quite lengthy-- the service of foot washing that Jesus does for the disciples. How in those simple actions, Jesus was once again in service to the world, service born of love for community. And the prime example of how we are all called to serve-- our love is an action-- our community. We experience community in relationships; relationships between two people-- ourselves and another-- but our community is not just those relationships put together. We understand on the micro level, but we are not limited to a micro community. Our community is not just who we know and spend our time with, our community is the entire body of our human brothers and sisters. The global community and every living thing in it.
I realize how 'hippie' this sounds. But it feels so enlightened. I was not reared to care this way for others-- sure, I was taught to be fair, and to not harm, and that my actions have consequences. But to actively seek loving others-- no, no, that I still am learning how to do. The more time I spend not struggling to care for me, the more energy I have to devote to keeping my eyes and ears open to witness the rest of the world live. And open eyes, once opened, cannot be closed without remembering images of what has already been seen. It's okay if I sound 'hippie,' because I'm finding out that if caring for others is 'hippie,' than that is a moniker I'll gladly accept.
I was able today to remember a not-too-distant dream of living in intentional community. And just because my first opportunity to live in intentional community did not come to long-term fruition, does not mean that the idea of living that way has failed. I still really believe that when you live together with others, when people born from different families depend on one another for their livelihood and in service to each other and to others, still, family is created. No one can control the circumstances of their birth, but we all can control where we go from there. I so often feel on the verge of getting it. On the verge of being able to cast away my materialism and consumeristic nature, to not only know logically that the things in life that are important don't have anything to do with how I look or how much I have, but how when I share what I have with others, I create beauty. Today, I remembered how close I have come to that feeling, and that it exists. I remembered why I wanted to start this blog, and more what the idea for this project was centered around-- the global community. To see what others are doing, beyond my sheltered life. To spread a message of empowerment and hope to more and more. To hear their stories and to acknowledge and preserve them as a source of encouragement to others who feel that they simply can't. My hope is to live and breathe and sleep and dream community. How could I have forgotten?
In conversation with a friend this weekend about living in service to community, she shared with me a really intriguing idea. It seems that she keeps a list. A list of 100 things-- a life list. I think this is probably somewhat similar to the 'Bucket List' idea, although I never saw the movie. The only difference here, is that you can't make your list all about you. It shouldn't be 100 things to do before you die that will bring you glory. Or even all things for the sake of doing them. The point is to make a list of 100 things that will benefit your community. Things that will make you a better person, more equipped to serve others. Things that will directly or indirectly provide some sort of service or relief to someone in need. And while that sounds really specific, (and also really 'hippie'), it needn't be boring. For instance, my friend has on her list that she'd like to own a beach house some day when she has extra funds to invest, so that she can volunteer her beach house as a retreat center for young people groups to gather for fellowship. While I don't necessarily want to add that to my list, I can understand that it's a bit more realistic for someone in her (or my) position to have a goal like that than to put on the list, 'give all of my possessions to charity'. In creating a goal, it is sometimes necessary to be realistic. I've only had a few days to think about it, but I thought that I would start my Community 100 List here-- and since I fully anticipate this blog will stay with me as I work toward #1, perhaps I'll get to cross some other things off the list, as well.
Community 100 List
1. Experience global community through the preparation and two year adventure of Project Empowerment (Project Global Community! Should we rename?)
2. Pay off my student loans, through my own blood, sweat and tears-- and never borrow again
3. Graduate with (not only degrees but) ideas and understanding to implement them
4. Understand and be able to communicate with enough Spanish and French for Latin America and Africa
5. Eat locally
6. Learn how to preserve and can
7. Garden and share the bounty with others, successfully
8. Walk more, drive less
9. Live more generously, bury selfishness
10. Meet brethren, and sit with God on all seven continents (or in the getting to of all seven continents)
11. Be a storyteller with hopeful and sometimes disturbing narratives-- and publish them
Clearly I'll be thinking about more ways to contribute to the global community-- and listing them-- this week!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
no day has to be ordinary
... and so, today was not. Work was business as usual, and there was nothing particularly alarming or frustrating or productive, per se. But there were definitely special moments that make today special. I started my day like this:
Cheerios and skim milk. I love those silly little travel containers-- perfect portions and the milk fits in the cereal container, to boot. I've got an 8 oz one to go with that 4 oz one, which is perfect when I bring a peanut butter and strawberry jam english muffin for brekkie.
Erica and I sweated it out cleaning out closets in the unairconditioning, but now the office is unboxed. We worked more on community news centers (read: bulletin boards). And we had a nice lunch in the narthex of the chapel. Maybe my blueberry brownies were involved.
After work I took a walking fieldtrip to... (drum roll, please!)
the LIBRARY!
It's been well over a year since I've been to the public library, despite its close proximity to my house. I mean, I suffered without access to the library in Indonesia. And now, here I am literally a five minute walk around the corner, and the last trip I took was with Ben. Talk about an untapped resource. How wealthy I am and how much i squander it.
I decided I wanted to look for a book about canning/preserving, but there weren't any on the shelves. Instead, I checked out tons of books on green, sustainable living! I was surprised there were so many options (I do live in DC, though... I probably shouldn't have been). I really picked up some great titles. I'm excited about an alternative to Netflix movies!
And after the library, there was time for cooking tasty food. Erica had pizza for lunch and man, it left me with a craving. I decided to make my own-- homemade sauce, homemade focaccia crust, and sauteed eggplant and red peppers with turkey pepperoni and GOAT CHEESE toppings! Not only tasty but healthy, too-- I used 2% milk mozzarella, whole wheat flour for my crust and an entire red bell pepper and eggplant, not to mention the can of whole tomatoes and whole onion in the sauce. Please forgive the unclean stove in the background.
See all the ways in which my day was not ordinary? Well, I'm utterly convinced-- I'm satisfied. That might be all I can ask for. And now, for a little more bedtime reading...
Cheerios and skim milk. I love those silly little travel containers-- perfect portions and the milk fits in the cereal container, to boot. I've got an 8 oz one to go with that 4 oz one, which is perfect when I bring a peanut butter and strawberry jam english muffin for brekkie.Erica and I sweated it out cleaning out closets in the unairconditioning, but now the office is unboxed. We worked more on community news centers (read: bulletin boards). And we had a nice lunch in the narthex of the chapel. Maybe my blueberry brownies were involved.
After work I took a walking fieldtrip to... (drum roll, please!)
the LIBRARY!It's been well over a year since I've been to the public library, despite its close proximity to my house. I mean, I suffered without access to the library in Indonesia. And now, here I am literally a five minute walk around the corner, and the last trip I took was with Ben. Talk about an untapped resource. How wealthy I am and how much i squander it.
I decided I wanted to look for a book about canning/preserving, but there weren't any on the shelves. Instead, I checked out tons of books on green, sustainable living! I was surprised there were so many options (I do live in DC, though... I probably shouldn't have been). I really picked up some great titles. I'm excited about an alternative to Netflix movies!
And after the library, there was time for cooking tasty food. Erica had pizza for lunch and man, it left me with a craving. I decided to make my own-- homemade sauce, homemade focaccia crust, and sauteed eggplant and red peppers with turkey pepperoni and GOAT CHEESE toppings! Not only tasty but healthy, too-- I used 2% milk mozzarella, whole wheat flour for my crust and an entire red bell pepper and eggplant, not to mention the can of whole tomatoes and whole onion in the sauce. Please forgive the unclean stove in the background.
See all the ways in which my day was not ordinary? Well, I'm utterly convinced-- I'm satisfied. That might be all I can ask for. And now, for a little more bedtime reading...
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
it's been quite awhile
since I've written. Yes, class and work are major consumers of my time, and when I'm focusing on deadlines and responsibilities, there is sometimes not a lot of time left for things that don't seem to be apparent priorities. But class and work have not been my sole reason for taking a hiatus from writing. I think, for awhile, I just didn't want to be introspective. I didn't want to take time to reflect on how my daily actions were reflecting the desire of my heart, which is this project. I didn't want to devote time to either what I was doing now to further that dream, or rather, what I wasn't doing. And I didn't want to devote time to thinking about how lack of action might mean that the empowerment project never comes to fruition-- and that I might become trapped in a life of comfort attempting to justify to myself why I didn't go. So, I just stopped: thinking, writing, brainstorming, networking, and planning.
But I did not stop dreaming. I did not stop talking. And I did not erase the hope that this project has created in my life.
So now, after a modest break from classes and a moderately lightened workload, I have had time to think. To put some perspective in the picture of this project (alliteration, anyone?). And I am ready to resume the regular periods of thought and self care that this journey will require of me.
I had a wonderful conversation this evening with new and old friends. We were talking about the things in life which we love. How those loves can define us, and how we can find happiness in pursuing those things. Now, ultimately we were operating from the assumption that the things that we love are healthy, good for us, and that these passions in life were pursuable. And generally speaking, the things that we shared around the table were: photography, reading, sewing. And I responded, "breathing," and felt both dumb and obvious.
But that is really my response, and I'm glad I've come to realize it. I love the act of living, how each day is an adventure, and how, when I give myself time, I am able to see my own self evolve. I love how I am capable of being taught and teaching others. I love breathing in all the wonderful things about my life: taking time for breath between my roles as student and administrator, breathing in the scents of summer, the aromas of new and interesting things to eat, the scent on the air in a foreign place-- including the smoggy streets of Jakarta and the salty seas of Delaware. And I love it most of all, when life takes my breath away-- when I see God working in my life and in the lives of others, when joy or excitement overwhelm me, and when all those little things line up and create big moments.
I'm an adventurer now, albeit a late-blooming, somewhat cautious adventurer. I am ready to take on more, to see more, to hear more, to experience more, to do more. I am ready to make a commitment in my life to do the things that I have forbidden myself to do, the things I am not most likely to do, and the things that I am afraid to do. A friend of mine and I recently had a conversation regarding life expectancy after my twenty-fifth birthday and how, if I live to be 75 (near the average life expectancy for an American female), at 25, one-third of my life has now elapsed. It really got me thinking about the things that have yet to be done, that I only have two-thirds left to do (if I'm lucky). I'm not going to keep myself bound to the expectations of others if I can't validate them. I'm not going to hold myself accountable to the things I said I'd 'never do' or 'always do' any longer if there's not a reason. It's time to create my own alternative reality: a different way to approach the practice of life that hopefully will defy some rules of society, will definitely defy former rules of mine, and hopefully will help me understand more that reality is not the life that society presents to me, but what I choose to accept.
I feel that I've grown up so much in the last six months, but still that I'll never be a "grown up". And in a lot of ways, I totally am, but there's still so much room for more. I've been reading the blogs of others (so much wisdom shared out there), and I've been exploring new and radical (to me) ideas of community, sustainable living, and creative life. I've been pretty moved by the ways others have committed themselves and their families to practices that most Americans would consider strange. They have joined community supported agriculture (CSA) organizations, have made budgets and committed to keeping themselves accountable to them, and have organized communities which are counter-cultural. Despite their unfamiliarity, I've been increasingly inspired by these actions made by individuals which demonstrate how they live out their convictions. I've always wanted to be opinionated and to stand by my convictions, but it has taken me until now to really feel strongly about the act of living. Slowly, as I learn more and understand better how things are done, I am developing opinions on how things should change. Now, that is radical.
So anyway, I'm excited by a ton of new ideas, and want to make this blog also (it's so multi-purpose) a catalog for the ones I'd like to adopt. I really feel that in the details of how I exist here and now, I will enable myself financially, emotionally, and spiritually to continue the dream I began this blog about. I also am ready to be a more reliable blogger, and hopefully beyond this post I can demonstrate that this vision is a priority for me, and not just pie-in-the-sky.
But I did not stop dreaming. I did not stop talking. And I did not erase the hope that this project has created in my life.
So now, after a modest break from classes and a moderately lightened workload, I have had time to think. To put some perspective in the picture of this project (alliteration, anyone?). And I am ready to resume the regular periods of thought and self care that this journey will require of me.
I had a wonderful conversation this evening with new and old friends. We were talking about the things in life which we love. How those loves can define us, and how we can find happiness in pursuing those things. Now, ultimately we were operating from the assumption that the things that we love are healthy, good for us, and that these passions in life were pursuable. And generally speaking, the things that we shared around the table were: photography, reading, sewing. And I responded, "breathing," and felt both dumb and obvious.
But that is really my response, and I'm glad I've come to realize it. I love the act of living, how each day is an adventure, and how, when I give myself time, I am able to see my own self evolve. I love how I am capable of being taught and teaching others. I love breathing in all the wonderful things about my life: taking time for breath between my roles as student and administrator, breathing in the scents of summer, the aromas of new and interesting things to eat, the scent on the air in a foreign place-- including the smoggy streets of Jakarta and the salty seas of Delaware. And I love it most of all, when life takes my breath away-- when I see God working in my life and in the lives of others, when joy or excitement overwhelm me, and when all those little things line up and create big moments.
I'm an adventurer now, albeit a late-blooming, somewhat cautious adventurer. I am ready to take on more, to see more, to hear more, to experience more, to do more. I am ready to make a commitment in my life to do the things that I have forbidden myself to do, the things I am not most likely to do, and the things that I am afraid to do. A friend of mine and I recently had a conversation regarding life expectancy after my twenty-fifth birthday and how, if I live to be 75 (near the average life expectancy for an American female), at 25, one-third of my life has now elapsed. It really got me thinking about the things that have yet to be done, that I only have two-thirds left to do (if I'm lucky). I'm not going to keep myself bound to the expectations of others if I can't validate them. I'm not going to hold myself accountable to the things I said I'd 'never do' or 'always do' any longer if there's not a reason. It's time to create my own alternative reality: a different way to approach the practice of life that hopefully will defy some rules of society, will definitely defy former rules of mine, and hopefully will help me understand more that reality is not the life that society presents to me, but what I choose to accept.
I feel that I've grown up so much in the last six months, but still that I'll never be a "grown up". And in a lot of ways, I totally am, but there's still so much room for more. I've been reading the blogs of others (so much wisdom shared out there), and I've been exploring new and radical (to me) ideas of community, sustainable living, and creative life. I've been pretty moved by the ways others have committed themselves and their families to practices that most Americans would consider strange. They have joined community supported agriculture (CSA) organizations, have made budgets and committed to keeping themselves accountable to them, and have organized communities which are counter-cultural. Despite their unfamiliarity, I've been increasingly inspired by these actions made by individuals which demonstrate how they live out their convictions. I've always wanted to be opinionated and to stand by my convictions, but it has taken me until now to really feel strongly about the act of living. Slowly, as I learn more and understand better how things are done, I am developing opinions on how things should change. Now, that is radical.
So anyway, I'm excited by a ton of new ideas, and want to make this blog also (it's so multi-purpose) a catalog for the ones I'd like to adopt. I really feel that in the details of how I exist here and now, I will enable myself financially, emotionally, and spiritually to continue the dream I began this blog about. I also am ready to be a more reliable blogger, and hopefully beyond this post I can demonstrate that this vision is a priority for me, and not just pie-in-the-sky.
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